I don’t want to go out and date, i’m not much of a conversationalist and I don’t talk much with people I don’t know or aren’t comfortable with.I have weird moments and sometimes I laugh a bit much,i’m clumsy and I guess I’ve never realised it but i’m more old fashioned than I probably ever thought .I know at my age I should be having summer romances and hot sex affairs , kissing random guys and there’s nothing wrong if you’re into that ,it just isn’t for me ,it get’s old and boring,like i’m running a circle ,sometimes they sound exciting and everybody has to have one.And you might think i’m stuck up because I know what I want and I know what you want and it’s two different things.I want a love story ,one that’s so good that if I ever told someone they wouldn’t believe me.I know romance movies even the best of them aren’t entirely realistic but the beauty is they still contain a small fraction of realism and that’s good enough and sometimes they’re more real than you could ever imagine.I don’t want heartbreaks or fond memories,one night stands which to me is like drinking a flat hot Pepsi.To me it’s like cheating your self . You get the Pepsi but it just isn’t the same.I want the sound whistling through the can ,cracking sound it makes ,the way your fingers go numb after holding it too long, yours eyes burn a bit from the acid and you feel and hear the popping.There are other things I could do with my time.I want electricity.Even if it kills me.
In the movie The Age of Adaline , Adaline doesn’t age past 29 years and her daughter grey and old says to her
” Don’t you miss having someone to love ” and she replies,
“It’s not the same when there’s no growing old together ,without that ,that love is just heartbreak .”