-Mom! Are you listening ? So Tyga was with blac chyna and he dumped her for one of the Kardashi- ,  Mom are you even hearing me ?

“Yes I’m listening !”

-Mom why do you buy these awful biscuits ? nobody eats these except you and their so boring and awful ,Mom please stop buying them .

” I like them , I always just pick them up as a snack ”

-Mom there’s a huge ass big eyed tarantula in there this big  !!!

” It’s just a baby teeny weeny spider Alexandria calm down ”

-Mom is my ass too small ?

“No you’re perfect , there’s nothing wrong with your ass , it looks bigger to me .”

-Mom you should see his body ughhh , he was foine , you know fine !

“He was ok ”

-Mom are you sleeping ?

” Mhmm ”

-Mom what if I can’t have kids

“I’d still love you and you can always adopt if you really want kids and science has advanced over the years you can get a surrogate , in vitro fertilisation etc ”

-Mom what if I was born looking like this ?

“I’d still love you”

-Mom I love you so much remember the oreos, okay sweetie pie sugar plum ,you gorgeous woman ?

“Yeah yeah ”

-Mom don’t download the app from the running phone slow ad it’s a malware virus !

“But it says my phone isn’t functioning! What’s going on with it !?”

Mom I think i’m dying , i’m not going to live , kill me and get it over with , I can’t go on any longer ,i’m never having kids .

“Did you take your iron ? that’s why your period is so painful and Alexandria you haven’t taken the tablet I gave you yet for your menstrual pain .”

-Mom this is to die for .

“No that color is not for you , take it off quick .”

-Mom this outfit though !!!

“I’m raising a young lady not a hooker .You’re not wearing that not even over my dead body ”

-I was being sarcastic you know I wouldn’t wear anything like this , right ?

-Mom I looked it up I WAS RIGHT !!!!!

“Yeah yeah get over yourself , happy now big head ?”

-Mom there’s so much to do and I don’t have enough time and what if I fail , what if I can’t do it ?

” Take a deep breath , eat some food , sleep a little and tonight i’m going to sit up with you while you do your assignment ok ? One step at a time Alexandria , it’s not the end of the world , just a difficult situation , you”ll get it done ”

Snippets of conversations that I secretly love that my mom and I have had over the years .What’s one of yours ?



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